I am NOT a doctor but I know a lot about vampires and Twilight. Wait, what?
Ok, I’ll admit, I have seen ALL of the Twilight movies in theatres. But before you start judging me, Phillip Banks, please let me submit my case. It was the winter of 2008 and I had just started dating my girlfriend, Katie, who had the first Twilight book at her house. So, in an attempt to show her my softer (and horrible taste in movies) side, I offered to take her and see the film adaptation. At the conclusion of the unofficially Oscar-nominated screen gem, in an effort to impress her, I remarked, Hey, that wasn’t so bad, eh? Katie wasn’t impressed. She didn’t like the movie… Pffft I totally didn’t like it either (or did I?). We did see the other two installments, but only to goof on them. It’s all in good fun though; I know there a lot of people, Twi-hards if you will, who dig the franchise. But hey, that’s cool, different strokes for different folks.
Anyways, let’s continue with the vampire theme. Many write off these creatures of the night as mere myth. However, like zombies, the day of invasion could be right around the corner, so if you don’t want to be face-to-fang with a vampire you need to take the proper precautions. So I suggest you stock up on an ingredient that not only FIGHTS VAMPIRES but FIGHTS CANCER as well: Garlic!
Garlic is the ultimate form of repellant against vampires; it’s their kryptonite. The only differences are kryptonite doesn’t help lower your risk of cancer, and it’s not nearly as delicious. Best Health wrote there’s evidence to show spicing up your food with garlic may cut your risk of esophageal, ovarian, kidney and other cancers, not only that, it will ward off sparkling vampires!
It comes with a price though, you run the risk of getting some seriously gnarly garlic breath that could potentially scare off vampires that are actually cool, like Count Chocula and The Lost Boys!
Dr. Steve, Ph.D. (Pretty Helpful Dude)